Monday, January 16, 2012

A Role Model Is Found In One Mom's Book Love

When Dawn Mannix, wife and mother of two, unearthed her copy of Jane Eyre in preparation for her Book Love interview, the tale that was written within had been read so many times since she was first introduced to it approximately twenty years earlier, it was familiar, welcoming and inspiring. However, this particular copy of the book managed to hold within not only Charlotte Brontë's words, but others, etched by a mysterious person holding a key to some forgotten piece of Dawn's dating life.

Can Book Love Lead To Romantic Love?

As Dawn has been my best friend for just about two decades, I received a phone call as soon as her book was found so that the serendipitous hilarity could be shared. In the front cover of Dawn's book was an inscription from a mysterious gentleman caller hoping that they both have a great time on their first date. He went even further to wish Dawn nothing but joy, love, and success in life. A beautiful sentiment written in Dawn's favorite book of all time. It seems the perfect gift. I thought, "Whoa, what a great first impression." Problem was - neither one of us could remember who this guy was. Dawn could barely make out his signature! After nearly 48 hours of squinting, scrutinizing, trying to remember a date in 1999, Dawn ultimately figured it out when she put her husband to the task of deciphering the handwriting.
It was a guy named Brendan she went on one date with. Obviously, no sparks. According to Dawn he was a cute guy, but had a little too much baggage. The lesson learned from this: Dawn really loves Jane Eyre and, evidently, while in her twenties, she would talk about it so much that some guy thought it was the key to impressing her on a first date.

Other First Impressions

While Brendan's first impression was fleeting, the enormous impact Jane had on Dawn hit first in a sophomore English class when she was 15 years old. Since Dawn and I went to high school together, we discussed what it was like to read the book at 15. I asked Dawn if she could remember how she identified with Jane Eyre when she first read the book. "I identified with how she sees herself versus how the world sees her. For example, she sees herself as plain, while she is described as a witch."

Dawn wishes that every girl of high school age could be given a copy of Jane Eyre to read. She said, "Young girls could take a tremendous amount from this book." When I asked her what she believes some of the big lessons were that Jane could impart, without hesitation, Dawn said, "[Jane] wouldn't let anybody demean her," throughout her entire story she was "never a damsel in distress. She didn't need a man." Dawn has only one reservation about the widespread distribution of the book - the vocabulary. When we discussed the possibility of an abridged or children's version of the book, I asked Dawn if she would start reading Jane Eyre to her daughter (in the first grade) now if she could. Her response, "Hailey would love Jane!" (I did find a "Classics Retold" version of the book released by Usborne Children's Books online, but have yet to actually read it or share this news with Dawn.)

Life Lessons

As Dawn read and re-read Jane Eyre over the years, even more life lessons came soaring through its pages to her. As she reminisced about all of the dramas in Jane's life, and how dignified Jane was through it all, she kept coming back to two themes that shone above all others. Dawn says it was in reading Jane Eyre that she "first learned that love is not perfect." For those who have read the book, this might be the understatement of the century - poor Jane and Rochester! Rochester who loved Bertha enough to care for her even after her madness, despite her affinity for fire, despite her desire to run around on all fours like an animal; Jane who love Rochester despite his mad wife, with or without his riches, with or without his vision. Their love was not perfect by a long shot. They are an extreme case, but the lesson does hold true.

The second poignant point Dawn picked up from Jane was her amazing ability to come back from so much hardship, and to come back from it stronger. When I asked Dawn if she ever employed a "WWJD - What would Jane Do?" perspective on a situation in her life since it had such a great impact on her, she laughed, but then more seriously answered, "I don't think there's any circumstance you can't come back from." She said she finds that most people don't believe this, but after reading this novel she has lived by this idea - no matter how bad it gets, even when your life seems to bottom out, there's always a way back.

Some of Dawn's Other Book Loves

When I asked Dawn how Jane Eyre affected her reading choices throughout her life she said that her favorite books have always been written by women. In her opinion, "Women write women accurately." Three of her top reads (after Jane, of course) are
  • Pride & Prejudice by Jane Austen
  • Little Women by Louisa May Alcott
  • Three Junes by Julia Glass
Have you had a book love lead you to romantic love?
Do you prefer exposing children to abridged or re-tellings of classic tales at a younger age, or waiting until they can "handle" the original version?
For lovers of Jane Eyre, what are the great lessons that Jane taught you?
Want to share your first book love? Check this out.

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